Shadow & Light

Darkness & silence
Peace unwraps its slumbering limbs 
she hungers
she feels
she needs
A deluge
No respite for the weary
Wrestle, wrestles, wrestling
Still
And the night
breathes again
For but a minute
Or three

Darkness & silence
A moment’s calm before the storm
Listen
Hidden melodies 
Cascading into glimmering hope
Soul’s repose
She cradles her in
Closer than close
Grace, grace 
That holds her to her post 

paperbacks & carousels

The story continues and breathless impatience overtakes me as his pen scribbles its crafted marks across these pages.

…he steals across my night readily armed with love…

steady. constant. sure. presence embraces heart and restores the ruins of promises yet to be;promises broken & forgotten. tears but an overture to the magnificent song he imagines that is mine.

…delight glistens in his eyes…

my soul awakens to his thoughts of me. his quiet gaze gathers me in, holding me fast toward him.

…his voice breaks the silence…

he tells me of conversations unspoken; conversations i thought no one would ever know. in my silence, he still speaks. in unwavering strength, i surrender the whispers of my heart to him.

.

the story continues as memories lay quietly withering in its wake. the glory of the past slowly surrendering to unknown wonders these eyes could have never dreamt to behold; shifting shades of the radiant dawn revealing glorious beauty that is the language of my soul.

[editor’s note: an old write-up i rediscovered. This picture still moves me…i close my eyes and i can see…i sit in silence, and i hear…an aroma is in the air, and i am entralled again]

Just a moment…

“Here in the West, the rapid pace of life often squeezes what is important into the periphery: the urgent displaces the important, the digital displaces the personal, the mass media affect our thinking whether we like it or not, leaving us entertained, titillated, or, ironically, bored…” ~ D.A. Carson

I don’t think it a coincidence that in a world where knowledge is more accessible to us than ever before and entertainment never a lack, we find ourselves still increasingly more dissatisfied with life. While it may seem that we have so much more control of information we need (or sometimes never even knew we wanted), we have become a people confused about who we are- our purpose, our person, our passion. Yes we are frustrated, and yet we remain disturbingly disengaged in its pursuit. We have learnt to be well-seasoned consumers, thoughtlessly giving over the shaping of our values, self-identity and dare I say finances to those who can best appeal to our stimulation-hungry senses. It is almost as if we’re afraid to give ourselves a chance to discover the truth.

Have we exchanged depth for expanse; quality for quantity; truth for information; fulfilment for satisfaction; intimacy for knowledge?

I believe that more than an ‘entertained’ life, we were designed to live a vibrant and fulfilled life. I believe that we were created for a purpose larger than our own self-satisfaction. Most importantly, I believe that in order to discover the truth…we must first allow ourselves the space and the permission to ask questions we may have no answers for, have conversations that go deeper than the trading of information & activities, and ponder the filters through which we formulate our world-views.

Mother

Her faithful strength sure
Scraped knee, broken heart, white dress
Love through the seasons

mother & child

Pause

wind-cuts on my cheeks
tell tales
of the speed in which i live
breath
but a drug that i inhale
for all the things
wanting yet to be achieved

of the invisible do i seek
no certainty
no end to the lack i perceive
like mortal cravings
for immortal feed
i hunger

night stirs silent sounds of peace
and when all is said
all done for the day
what was lost in strained pursuit
is found again in simple truth

I concede

worth more than gold
in dwellings thieves cannot behold
that deeply satisfies my soul
the I Am…

He was
and is
and will be so

breathe.

Chains of Freedom

That ever elusive chase after freedom starts at a young age: the kid wants to watch something they can’t, the teenager wants a later curfew and no restraints from authority figures, the young adult wants to choose their own path in life with no constraints…it’s that fight for getting rid of those chains that weigh us down- “I’ll do it my way”, “Don’t box me in”, “Don’t tell me what to do”!

def. Freedom |ˈfrēdəm| NOUN: the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint

32 years has got me thinking a lot about this thing called freedom. While I agree that freedom requires the necessary ‘casting off’ of certain types of restraints, too often we experience a “freedom” of sorts only to later realise that some of the things we got ourselves into when we were ‘free’ weren’t as freeing as we initially thought. No…freedom cannot just be a life without restraint…something seems to be missing from the equation.

I was always quite baffled at why Jesus said “my yolk is easy, and my burden is light” (Matt 11:30). I had a notion that He came to take away our burdens; he came to free us from the chains…why would He use that analogy to talk to us about the nature of His Kingdom, and His plan for our lives? The idea that being weighed down by something can actually be a GOOD thing feels so paradoxical, and yet is there is truth in there somewhere?

Perhaps true freedom is not just the ‘casting off’ to live a life of reckless abandonment, rather also the bearing of the right kind of weight- a life that is still governed, that still has boundaries but its boundaries protect, cultivates health and produces good.

Begin

Words unspoken lay smouldering in the depths of my heart
Faint yet reminding
Whispers of a life unknown
An invitation; a call to deep; a recovering

In darkness… flicker… flicker
My eyes strain to see the forming
A sound arises- still; small
Silence awakening to the breath of your calling

Arise my soul and sing
Stoke the fire within
Re-ignite what was once aflame
Let His-Story be told
Draw a line in the sand —— begin.

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